For me personally, being narcissistic is like having a giant pimple on my nose – I am entirely aware of it, but don’t want anyone to point it out, if that makes any sense.
Ever since I was little, I have been told that one shouldn’t be self-centered. In other words, I grew up with the notion that self-centeredness is something extremely bad and perverse. For that reason, I’ve been trying not to be (too) self-centered in my offline life – but that’s as though one suppresses or tampers with nature, because it’s innate that people have whatever levels of non-pathological narcissism. Hence the Internet is partially a kind of escapism and shelter in which I’m allowed to be as narcissistic as I want to be; yet somehow I’m starting to notice the confines. To be honest I thought there were no boundaries when it comes to blogging, until someone pointed out that pimple on my nose and indicated that it’s a problem. Anyway, at first blogs had the same function as diaries, so it’s normal to talk about yourself in it. Blogging is narcissistic – it’s fundamental in terms of style blogging, and I guess I’m just a tad surprised that someone emphasized that I reek of narcissism as if it’s not normal regarding blogging.
The reason why I’m posting this is because I want my current and prospective visitors to take a look at this page so as not to be thoroughly appalled by the excessive narcissism here. By and large, my blog serves as a device to help me on the long route to the perfect wardrobe, to sort out thoughts on fashion and style, and so on. All my favorite style blogs follow the same concept, but I have earnestly never perceived and will never perceive them as morbidly self-absorbed bloggers.
It’s such a shame that self-centeredness is a “taboo” (at least that’s how I see it), which explicates why my mind is a complete mess. I have never been open to my friends or family regarding feelings and more profound thoughts and subjects, as I fear being too self-centered. I don’t think that’s healthy at all. Often when I inevitably talk about myself to people, the sense of shame haunts my mind for days. Therefore, I want to overlook the limitations in terms of blogging and celebrate healthy narcissism on my blog.
However, I suppose that’s enough navel-gazing for today, and I really hope the concept of my blog is clear. And please don’t point out that ugly zit (or my vulnerability), I’m aware of it and I like to pretend that it isn’t visible. Happy tuesday :)